It's one louder then, isn't it?


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To(p) Eleven…

Never one to disappoint, I make up for the relative obscurity of the items on this list by giving you that little extra push over the cliff… One extra entry! Now don't you feel special. (Updated weekly and in no particular order.)

The Inescapable Role:

Okay, film fans… this week we have a list that might require a wee bit of effort, but bear with me. Often, actors accept roles from which they never escape. From that day forward, they are no longer addressed by their true identity and even transcend the moniker of "that guy from (insert movie title, genre, etc. here)". This list exists for those actors who became that character. At least in the public eye… Now we aren't talking about actors who consistently play themselves (Pacino, Pesci, etc.) but those who, when you see them, you instantly think of their character name rather than their real name. And now… the list.
  1. The Cheers Crew – Sam, Dianne, Norm and Cliff (aka Ted Danson, Shelley Long, George Wendt and John Ratzenberger): Though rarely seen on screen, whenever you even hear their voices, you think of their Cheers character.
  2. Captain James T. Kirk (aka William Shatner): Bill has almost come full circle but you still think "Kirk" when you see him. C'mon, admit it.
  3. Fox Mulder (aka David Duchovny): No contest. It really doesn't help that he keeps getting cast as Mulder in everything he does but Mulder he forever will be.
  4. Dr. Hannibal Lecter (aka Sir Anthony Hopkins): Rarely has there been an actor so talented, fundamentally unable to escape a role. Even if Tony hooked up being cast as Mr. Rogers (and played it amazingly), he would still be Hannibal the Cannibal.
  5. Mr. Blonde (aka Michael Madsen): This guy was in Free Willy and all you could think about was how he was going to manage cut the ear off a friggin' whale!!!
  6. Kramer (aka Michael Richards): Poor bastard. He will NEVER live this down.
  7. Mr. Roarke (aka Ricardo Montalban): I know. I know. All the Trek dorks out there are screaming, "What about Kahn?!?!?!" Tell you what. If you can honestly tell me you didn't sit through that film wondering when Tattoo was gonna show up, I'll take him off the list.
  8. Jack Tripper (aka John Ritter): This has to be one of the worst roles of all time one was unable to escape. Not only did this poor sucker live with a slew of hotties and never get any, but he had to hang with that Larry creep and now has to be called "Jack" for the rest of eternity.
  9. The Happy Days/Laverne & Shirley Gang – The Fonz, Richie Cunningham, Laverne, Chachi, Squiggy, etc. (aka Henry Winkler, Ron Howard, Penny Marshall, Scott Baio, David Lander, etc.): Some serious lumping going on here but you know you have to agree. Henry is always going to be the Fonz. Ron is just an old, bald Richie. Penny? Duh. It doesn't matter who Scott Baio nails (and he has been with an impressive list), he will always be Chachi. And Squiggy? I just typed his real name and can't even remember it.
  10. Luke Skywalker (aka Mark Hamill): Poor Luke. It would take some serious Jedi mind trickin' to get him extracted from this role.
  11. Gilligan (aka Bob Denver): Though I sincerely tried to stick to the rules of listing actors who actually continued to appear on screen (the big screen, preferably), this list just wouldn't be complete without our favorite "little buddy".
So that's this week's To(p) Eleven. Have a list you would like me to try to generate? Send me a request.

Critter Critique: This week's review brought to you by Gavin.
Fatal Attraction:  Yet another example of Hollywood schlock served up in a double boiler. Though Fatal Attraction starts innocently enough, I was shocked and appalled to witness the on-screen atrocity put forth as entertainment in act three. Trust me, this one is not fit for man nor beast. Ginger Pants